tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17612748980377540592024-03-13T07:41:38.208-03:00.....Chistes & Chistes..... SONRIA CON ALEGRIAUn lugar donde encontrar una nota de buen humor.
Los chistes publicados son colaboraciones.
Envie su chiste a:
colaboraciones@sonriaconalegria.com.arUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger1417125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-22626717437931913682014-08-28T09:40:00.001-03:002014-08-28T09:40:14.841-03:00Ricardo, tu contraseña se ha restablecido satisfactoriamente<span class="preheader" style="display: none !important; font-size: 1px;">Has restablecido tu contraseña.</span><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; border-collapse:collapse; width:100% !important; font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; margin:0; padding:0;" width="100%" bgcolor="#DFDFDF"><tbody><tr><td colspan="3"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="1"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:5px;font-size:5px;line-height:5px;"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" border="0" align="center" width="100%" style="table-layout: fixed;"><tr><td align="center"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; min-width:290px;" width="540" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:8px;font-size:8px;line-height:8px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;" width="100%" bgcolor="#DDDDDD"><tbody><tr><td align="left" valign="middle" width="95" height="21" id="base-header-logo"><a style="text-decoration:none;cursor:pointer;border:none;display:block;height:21px;width:100%;" href='http://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hze2xdht-70&t=nmp&midToken=AQFuBe1L3ak9vw&ek=security_reset_password_notification'><img src='http://s.c.lnkd.licdn.com/scds/common/u/images/email/logos/logo_linkedin_tm_email_95x21_v1.png' width="95" height="21" alt="LinkedIn" style="border:none;text-decoration:none;"/></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:8px;font-size:8px;line-height:8px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;" width="100%" bgcolor="#333333"><tbody><tr><td width="20" class="responsive-spacer"><table width="20" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="100%"><table width='500' cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" border="0" class="header-spacer" style="table-layout: fixed;"><tbody><tr><td width='500'><div style='height:12px;font-size:12px;line-height:12px;width:500px;'> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="20" class="responsive-spacer"><table width="20" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><tbody><tr><td width="20" class="res-width10"><table width="20px" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-width10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td style="color: #333333; font-family: Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 18px;" align="left"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-height10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><tbody><tr><td>Hola, Ricardo:</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>Has cambiado tu contraseña de LinkedIn satisfactoriamente.</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>¡Gracias por usar LinkedIn!</td></tr><tr><td>El equipo de LinkedIn</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="20" class="res-width10"><table width="20px" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-width10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:5px;font-size:5px;line-height:5px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; padding:20px;font-size:13px;line-height:14px;background-color:#f1f1f1;color:#333333" width="540" bgcolor="#F1F1F1" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td><!--[if !mso 9]><!--><div class="show-for-mobile" style="background-color:none;width:0;max-height:0;visibility:collapse;overflow:hidden;float:left;display:none;"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" class="show-for-mobile" align="left"><tbody><tr><td>Dónde y cuándo sucedió:</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td class="label" style="color:#999999">Fecha:</td></tr><tr><td>28 de agosto de 2014 9:40</td></tr><tr><td class="label" style="color:#999999;padding-top:10px;">Navegador:</td></tr><tr><td>Firefox</td></tr><tr><td class="label" style="color:#999999;padding-top:10px;">Sistema operativo:</td></tr><tr><td>Windows</td></tr><tr><td class="label" style="color:#999999;padding-top:10px;">Dirección IP:</td></tr><tr><td>186.48.6.74</td></tr><tr><td class="label" style="color:#999999;padding-top:10px;">Ubicación aproximada:</td></tr><tr><td>Montevideo, Departamento de Montevideo, Uruguay</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr ><td colspan="2"><strong>¿No lo has hecho tú?</strong> Asegúrate de <a style="text-decoration:none;color:#0077B5;" target="blank" href="https://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hze2xdht-70&a=uas-request-password-reset&midToken=AQFuBe1L3ak9vw&ek=security_reset_password_notification">cambiar la contraseña</a> inmediatamente.</td></tr></tbody></table></div><!--<![endif]--><div class="hide-for-mobile"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" class="hide-for-mobile" align="left"><tbody><tr><td align="left" colspan="2">Dónde y cuándo sucedió:</td></tr><tr><td align="left"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left" class="label" style="color:#999999">Fecha:</td><td align="left">28 de agosto de 2014 9:40</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:1px;font-size:1px;line-height:1px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left" class="label" style="color:#999999">Navegador:</td><td align="left">Firefox</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:1px;font-size:1px;line-height:1px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left" class="label" style="color:#999999">Sistema operativo:</td><td align="left">Windows</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:1px;font-size:1px;line-height:1px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left" class="label" style="color:#999999">Dirección IP:</td><td align="left">186.48.6.74</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:1px;font-size:1px;line-height:1px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left" class="label" style="color:#999999">Ubicación aproximada:</td><td align="left">Montevideo, Departamento de Montevideo, Uruguay</td></tr><tr><td align="left"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr ><td align="left" colspan="2"><strong>¿No lo has hecho tú?</strong> Asegúrate de <a style="text-decoration:none;color:#0077B5;" target="blank" href="https://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hze2xdht-70&a=uas-request-password-reset&midToken=AQFuBe1L3ak9vw&ek=security_reset_password_notification">cambiar la contraseña</a> inmediatamente.</td></tr></tbody></table></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="540" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td align="left"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; color:#999999;" width="100%" class="responsive res-font10"><tbody><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td>Este mensaje de correo electrónico estaba dirigido a Ricardo Díaz (DIRECTOR en BORISUR S.A.). <a style="text-decoration:none;color:#0077B5;" href="http://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hze2xdht-70&a=customerServiceUrl&midToken=AQFuBe1L3ak9vw&ek=security_reset_password_notification&articleId=4788">Averigua por qué incluimos esto.</a></td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>©2014 LinkedIn Ireland, Gardner House, Wilton Plaza, Wilton Place, Dublín 2, Irlanda</td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></table></td></tr></tbody></table><img src="http://www.linkedin.com/emimp/20injc-hze2xdht-70.gif" style="width:1px; height:1px;"/>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-54753001293530160272014-08-21T12:28:00.001-03:002014-08-21T12:28:36.043-03:00Viejo Malo todavía está esperando que te unas a Twitter...<!-- 100% body table, class outerinvite --> <table class="outerinvite" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <!-- Frame --> <table class="frame" width="542" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td style="font-size: 1px;" class="top-spacer" height="40" valign="top"><img width="1" height="1" style="display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" src="https://twitter.com/scribe/ibis?uid=0&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&nid=156+20+20140820&t=1" /> </td> </tr> <tr> <td valign="top"> <!-- Top corners --> <table class="top-corners" bgcolor="#eeeeee" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="12" valign="top"><img class="cut" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/top-corners.png" width="522" height="12" alt="Top corners image" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Top corners --> <!-- Content --> <table style="border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; border-left-color: #cccccc; border-right-style: solid; border-right-width: 1px; border-right-color: #cccccc;" class="content" bgcolor="#ffffff" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td width="522" align="center" valign="top"> <table class="invite" width="520" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> <td class="invite-top spacer" height="38" width="82%" valign="top"> </td> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td align="center" valign="top"> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> </td> <td class="avatar avatar-last" width="96"><a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b&t=1&sig=c1e87273a561da5a019af4521d40e30ed8d0b578&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&nid=156+478+20140820" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;"><img border="0" class="avatar-image" src="https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1097194871/Foto_3_reasonably_small.jpg" width="96" height="96" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;border-radius:3px;" /></a></td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="20" colspan="5"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Avatar images --> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <p class="names" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:18px;line-height:normal;color:#333333;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:25px;margin-top:2px !important;margin-bottom:22px !important;"> <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b&t=1&sig=14bb4cd2db6f9a4c02a954d3c563666e173d8f63&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&nid=156+475+20140820" class="name" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;font-weight:bold;color:#333333;text-decoration:none;">Viejo Malo</a> todavía está esperando a que te unas a Twitter... <img width="1" height="1" src="loadimage" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" /> </p> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <table bgcolor="##55acee" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="170px" class="button-container" style="white-space:nowrap;background-color:#55acee;background-image:url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/button-bg-sp.png);border-radius:5px;-moz-border-radius:5px;-webkit-border-radius:5px;text-align:center;height:1px;width:180px;"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="44" align="center" class="button-cta" style="font-size:18px;font-weight:bold;white-space:nowrap;overflow:hidden;padding:0px 5px;margin:0px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;-webkit-font-smoothing:antialiased;"> <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b&t=1&sig=42fdb5da69301b8f624a8aaeac9d006103b301b1&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&nid=156+442+20140820" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;color:#ffffff;text-decoration:none;"> <bold> Aceptar invitación </bold> </a> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td height="20"> </td> <td> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Content --> <!-- Envelope --> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="envelope" valign="top"> <img class="cut" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/envelope-with-logo.png" width="542" height="133" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Envelope --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Frame --> <!-- Footer --> <table class="footer" style="background: url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/footer-shadow.png) top repeat-x; border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; border-top-color: #cccccc;" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td valign="top"> <table class="footer-inner" width="500" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="25"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td class="ios" valign="top"> <p style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;">You can <a href="https://twitter.com/i/o?t=1&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&c=gRabkUV%2B6AqGNgAvFliYFXST8gXJIZpmS2yXIdPEN0Q%3D&nid=156+26+20140820" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">stop</a> getting these emails with people you may know (PYMK) suggestions at anytime. Learn more about <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com%2Farticles%2F20170137&t=1&sig=7ea7f1b959b76c80339e1c0605f0d3d87fd24b2e&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&nid=156+1539+20140820" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">PYMK suggestions</a> or <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com&t=1&sig=33c40c1572f50259cd914a0d0bf78be3b41cd44a&iid=4176806c11d44946a7b36da75b3f1640&uid=0&nid=156+97+20140820" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">find other answers</a> at Twitter's Help Center.</p> <p class="address" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#999999;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;"> <a href="#" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;color:#999999;">Twitter, Inc. 1355 Market St., Suite 900<span class="break"></span> San Francisco, CA 94103</a></p> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="30"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Footer --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ 100% body table, class outerinvite --> Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-28781503546884286182014-08-17T14:47:00.001-03:002014-08-17T14:47:40.680-03:00Viejo Malo te envió una invitación<!-- 100% body table, class outerinvite --> <table class="outerinvite" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <!-- Frame --> <table class="frame" width="542" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td style="font-size: 1px;" class="top-spacer" height="40" valign="top"><img width="1" height="1" style="display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" src="https://twitter.com/scribe/ibis?uid=0&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&nid=244+20&t=1" /> </td> </tr> <tr> <td valign="top"> <!-- Top corners --> <table class="top-corners" bgcolor="#eeeeee" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="12" valign="top"><img class="cut" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/top-corners.png" width="522" height="12" alt="Top corners image" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Top corners --> <!-- Content --> <table style="border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; border-left-color: #cccccc; border-right-style: solid; border-right-width: 1px; border-right-color: #cccccc;" class="content" bgcolor="#ffffff" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td width="522" align="center" valign="top"> <table class="invite" width="520" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> <td class="invite-top spacer" height="38" width="82%" valign="top"> </td> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td align="center" valign="top"> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> </td> <td class="avatar avatar-last" width="96"><a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b&t=1&sig=631e7bbe2c6ad628914bac67673277014490da1d&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&nid=244+525" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;"><img border="0" class="avatar-image" src="https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1097194871/Foto_3_reasonably_small.jpg" width="96" height="96" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;border-radius:3px;" /></a></td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="20" colspan="5"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Avatar images --> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <p class="names" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:18px;line-height:normal;color:#333333;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:25px;margin-top:2px !important;margin-bottom:22px !important;"> ¡<a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b&t=1&sig=fe4d7f4f13e36f98cf5c8f6c5a1593cda6990519&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&nid=244+524" class="name" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;font-weight:bold;color:#333333;text-decoration:none;">Viejo Malo</a> te ha invitado a que te unas a Twitter! </p> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <table bgcolor="##55acee" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="170px" class="button-container" style="white-space:nowrap;background-color:#55acee;background-image:url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/button-bg-sp.png);border-radius:5px;-moz-border-radius:5px;-webkit-border-radius:5px;text-align:center;height:1px;width:180px;"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="44" align="center" class="button-cta" style="font-size:18px;font-weight:bold;white-space:nowrap;overflow:hidden;padding:0px 5px;margin:0px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;-webkit-font-smoothing:antialiased;"> <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd7b9cabe-774b-4b1f-b056-db65b2a4a84b%3Fn%3DSonria%2Bcon%2BAlegria&t=1&sig=a7f5688bb28abd9944fbf32d24923ee41b926295&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&nid=244+442" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;color:#ffffff;text-decoration:none;"> <bold> Aceptar invitación </bold> </a> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td height="20"> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <!--dir: ab_social_proof.html--> <!--end dir: ab_social_proof.html--> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Content --> <!-- Envelope --> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="envelope" valign="top"> <img class="cut" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/envelope-with-logo.png" width="542" height="133" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Envelope --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Frame --> <!-- Footer --> <table class="footer" style="background: url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/footer-shadow.png) top repeat-x; border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; border-top-color: #cccccc;" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td valign="top"> <table class="footer-inner" width="500" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="25"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td class="ios" valign="top"> <p style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;">You can <a href="https://twitter.com/i/o?t=1&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&c=gRabkUV%2B6AqGNgAvFliYFXST8gXJIZpmS2yXIdPEN0Q%3D&nid=244+26" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">stop</a> getting these emails with people you may know (PYMK) suggestions at anytime. Learn more about <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com%2Farticles%2F20170137&t=1&sig=6b518346eba7ba38b3e4916d062ef1bb0319c01e&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&nid=244+1539" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">PYMK suggestions</a> or <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com&t=1&sig=206bdc9c002c568b8a4875d7522cf195edfa3e7d&iid=8e525540c3444c47aab95e36725e68b0&uid=0&nid=244+97" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">find other answers</a> at Twitter's Help Center.</p> <p class="address" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#999999;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;"> <a href="#" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;color:#999999;">Twitter, Inc. 1355 Market St., Suite 900<span class="break"></span> San Francisco, CA 94103</a></p> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="30"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Footer --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ 100% body table, class outerinvite --> Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-89042874058818902032014-08-17T09:33:00.001-03:002014-08-17T09:33:51.632-03:00Viejo Malo te envió una invitación<!-- 100% body table, class outerinvite --> <table class="outerinvite" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <!-- Frame --> <table class="frame" width="542" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td style="font-size: 1px;" class="top-spacer" height="40" valign="top"><img width="1" height="1" style="display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" src="https://twitter.com/scribe/ibis?uid=0&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&nid=244+20&t=1" /> </td> </tr> <tr> <td valign="top"> <!-- Top corners --> <table class="top-corners" bgcolor="#eeeeee" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="12" valign="top"><img class="cut" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; display: block;margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/top-corners.png" width="522" height="12" alt="Top corners image" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Top corners --> <!-- Content --> <table style="border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; border-left-color: #cccccc; border-right-style: solid; border-right-width: 1px; border-right-color: #cccccc;" class="content" bgcolor="#ffffff" width="522" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td width="522" align="center" valign="top"> <table class="invite" width="520" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> <td class="invite-top spacer" height="38" width="82%" valign="top"> </td> <td class="spacer" width="9%"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td align="center" valign="top"> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> </td> <td class="avatar avatar-last" width="96"><a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd4762af1-c8df-4fce-aad5-428ed9b3c7d4&t=1&sig=1e855c6f6f2d9b3b6b013e0db39f26cc28aec3a3&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&nid=244+525" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;"><img border="0" class="avatar-image" src="https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1097194871/Foto_3_reasonably_small.jpg" width="96" height="96" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;border-radius:3px;" /></a></td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="20" colspan="5"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Avatar images --> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <p class="names" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:18px;line-height:normal;color:#333333;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:25px;margin-top:2px !important;margin-bottom:22px !important;"> ¡<a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd4762af1-c8df-4fce-aad5-428ed9b3c7d4&t=1&sig=73443ada67afaf5eee32df0be8827811ad6acd02&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&nid=244+524" class="name" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;font-weight:bold;color:#333333;text-decoration:none;">Viejo Malo</a> te ha invitado a que te unas a Twitter! </p> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td valign="top" align="center"> <table bgcolor="##55acee" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="170px" class="button-container" style="white-space:nowrap;background-color:#55acee;background-image:url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/button-bg-sp.png);border-radius:5px;-moz-border-radius:5px;-webkit-border-radius:5px;text-align:center;height:1px;width:180px;"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="44" align="center" class="button-cta" style="font-size:18px;font-weight:bold;white-space:nowrap;overflow:hidden;padding:0px 5px;margin:0px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;-webkit-font-smoothing:antialiased;"> <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Fd4762af1-c8df-4fce-aad5-428ed9b3c7d4%3Fn%3DSonria%2Bcon%2BAlegria&t=1&sig=bba6c5000f39aa4f872bdb0e601bffc51a132c53&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&nid=244+442" style="color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;color:#ffffff;text-decoration:none;"> <bold> Aceptar invitación </bold> </a> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> </td> <td height="20"> </td> <td> </td> </tr> <!--dir: ab_social_proof.html--> <!--end dir: ab_social_proof.html--> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Content --> <!-- Envelope --> <table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td class="envelope" valign="top"> <img class="cut" border="0" src="https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/envelope-with-logo.png" width="542" height="133" style="margin:0px;padding:0px;display:block;" /></td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Envelope --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Frame --> <!-- Footer --> <table class="footer" style="background: url(https://ea.twimg.com/email/t1/invite/footer-shadow.png) top repeat-x; border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; border-top-color: #cccccc;" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td valign="top"> <table class="footer-inner" width="500" border="0" align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td height="25"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td class="ios" valign="top"> <p style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;">You can <a href="https://twitter.com/i/o?t=1&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&c=gRabkUV%2B6AqGNgAvFliYFXST8gXJIZpmS2yXIdPEN0Q%3D&nid=244+26" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">stop</a> getting these emails with people you may know (PYMK) suggestions at anytime. Learn more about <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com%2Farticles%2F20170137&t=1&sig=c8da6c69a705c3006294a4ff18530161256a9892&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&nid=244+1539" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">PYMK suggestions</a> or <a href="https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsupport.twitter.com&t=1&sig=4a3e68501d6ccdf7aa4184107ae3066b55acf089&iid=af1c33c16a354b6c920a9d4113a4435e&uid=0&nid=244+97" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;">find other answers</a> at Twitter's Help Center.</p> <p class="address" style="font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#777777;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;font-family:'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;line-height:normal;color:#999999;text-shadow:0 1px 0 #ffffff;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:15px;"> <a href="#" style="text-decoration:none;color:#999999;color:#0084b4;text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;color:#999999;">Twitter, Inc. 1355 Market St., Suite 900<span class="break"></span> San Francisco, CA 94103</a></p> </td> </tr> <tr> <td height="30"> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ Footer --> </td> </tr> </tbody> </table> <!--/ 100% body table, class outerinvite --> Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-68124723760189990492014-07-07T16:56:00.001-03:002014-07-07T16:56:32.661-03:00Ricardo, tu contraseña se ha restablecido satisfactoriamente<span class="preheader" style="display: none !important; font-size: 1px;">Has restablecido tu contraseña.</span><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" bgcolor="#DFDFDF"><tbody><tr><td colspan="3"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="1"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:5px;font-size:5px;line-height:5px;"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="center" width="100%"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; min-width:290px;" width="540" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:8px;font-size:8px;line-height:8px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;" width="100%" bgcolor="#DDDDDD"><tbody><tr><td align="left" valign="middle" width="95" height="21" id="base-header-logo"><a style="text-decoration:none;cursor:pointer;border:none;display:block;height:21px;width:100%;" href='http://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hxc7m5dq-5f&t=nmp&ek=security_reset_password_notification'><img src='http://s.c.lnkd.licdn.com/scds/common/u/images/email/logos/logo_linkedin_tm_email_95x21_v1.png' width="95" height="21" alt="LinkedIn" style="border:none;text-decoration:none;"/></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:8px;font-size:8px;line-height:8px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;" width="100%" bgcolor="#333333"><tbody><tr><td width="20" class="responsive-spacer"><table width="20" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="100%"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:12px;font-size:12px;line-height:12px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="20"><table width="20" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><tbody><tr><td width="20" class="res-width10"><table width="20px" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-width10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td style="color: #333333; font-family: Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 18px;" align="left"><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-height10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><tbody><tr><td>Hola, Ricardo:</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>Has cambiado tu contraseña de LinkedIn satisfactoriamente.</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>¡Gracias por usar LinkedIn!</td></tr><tr><td>El equipo de LinkedIn</td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="20" class="res-width10"><table width="20px" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer res-width10"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:0px;font-size:0px;line-height:0px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="540" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td align="left"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; " width="100%" class="responsive"><tbody><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; color:#999999;" width="100%" class="responsive res-font10"><tbody><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td>Este mensaje de correo electrónico estaba dirigido a Ricardo Díaz (DIRECTOR en BORISUR S.A.). <a style="text-decoration:none;color:#0077B5;" href="http://www.linkedin.com/e/v2?e=20injc-hxc7m5dq-5f&a=customerServiceUrl&ek=security_reset_password_notification&articleId=4788">Averigua por qué incluimos esto.</a></td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td>©2014 LinkedIn Ireland, Gardner House, Wilton Plaza, Wilton Place, Dublín 2, Irlanda</td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" class="email-spacer"><tbody><tr><td><div style="height:20px;font-size:20px;line-height:20px"> </div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><img src="http://www.linkedin.com/emimp/20injc-hxc7m5dq-5f.gif" style="width:1px; height:1px;"/>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-48736528951594008102014-02-19T19:31:00.001-03:002014-02-19T19:31:35.602-03:00Confirmación del cambio de contraseña de LinkedIn<table border="0" width="550" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="max-width:550px; border-top:4px solid #39C; font: 12px arial, sans-serif; margin: 0 auto;" class=""><tr><td> <h1 style="color: #000; font: bold 23px arial; margin:5px 0;" class="">LinkedIn</h1> <p style="margin-bottom: 6pt;">Hola, Ricardo:</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 6pt;">Has cambiado tu contraseña con éxito.</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 6pt;">Gracias,</p> <p>El equipo de LinkedIn</p> <table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="font-family:Arial;" width="100%" class="responsive"> <tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" class=""><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px;"> </div></td></tr></table></td></tr> <tr> <td align="left" style="font-size:11px; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; color:#999999;"> Este mensaje de correo electrónico estaba dirigido a Ricardo Díaz (DIRECTOR en BORISUR S.A.). <a style="color: #006699" href="http://www.linkedin.com/e/5abgs3-hrv6dztn-1g/plh/http%3A%2F%2Flinkedin-es%2Ecusthelp%2Ecom%2Fapp%2Fanswers%2Fdetail%2Fa_id%2F4788/ioYs/?hs=false&tok=1WuPpISnh7e681">Averigua la razón por la que incluimos esto</a>. © 2014, LinkedIn Corporation. 2029 Stierlin Ct., Mountain View, CA 94043 EE. UU. </td> </tr> <tr><td><table width="1" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" class=""><tr><td><div style="height:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:10px;"> </div></td></tr></table></td></tr> </table> <img src="http://www.linkedin.com/emimp/5abgs3-hrv6dztn-1g.gif" style="width:1px; height:1px;"/>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-24687018071940838892012-09-07T13:25:00.000-03:002012-09-07T17:25:34.873-03:00!!!!<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Un tipo llega a las puertas del cielo, donde lo recibe San Pedro quien, tras consultar un registro que tiene delante, le dice: Veamos, no has hecho nada especialmente malo en la vida, pero la verdad es que tampoco has hecho nada especialmente bueno. Me temo que una cosa viene a compensar la otra. No se puede decir que hayas hecho nada extraordinario, o sea que no te puedo dejar pasar.<br>Pero, ¿Y lo de los pandilleros?<br>Explícate.<br>Iba conduciendo por una carretera, de noche, cuando vi a un grupo de pandilleros dando una paliza a un pobre tipo. Salí del coche, me acerqué al jefe del grupo y lo golpeé en toda la cara.<br>¡Caramba!<br>Y entonces les dije a todos que soltaran al tipo o se las iban a tener que ver conmigo, así que lo soltaron.<br>Vaya, es estupendo, ¿Y cuando ocurrió eso?<br>¡Pues, hace un par de minutos!</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-59346053290674423822012-09-07T12:54:00.000-03:002012-09-07T13:02:03.818-03:00El mejor<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">¿Qué mujer ha tenido el mejor físico? <br>La esposa de Einstein. </p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-9046708451264662792012-09-07T12:53:00.003-03:002012-09-07T12:53:54.902-03:00Querida maestra<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Estaba Pepito en el colegio y le dice a la maestra:<br>Maestra, ¿La puedo saludar de beso?<br>Y la maestra le responde:<br>Por supuesto que sí, ya veo que quieres mejorar tus modales.<br>Pepito le dice:<br>No, es que tengo gripe y se la quiero pasar.</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-54794679867907910502012-09-07T12:53:00.001-03:002012-09-07T12:53:09.538-03:00obediente<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Una vez un niño, empezó a preparar cientos de bolsitas de Té, su papá al ver esto le pregunta:<br>Hijo, ¿por qué preparas tanto té?<br>Y el hijo le responde:<br>Es que papi, yo leí, "Jesús viene, prepara..té</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-27284854621579818772012-09-07T12:52:00.001-03:002012-09-07T12:52:37.892-03:00Regalo<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Era una vez que a un niño que le habían regalado una bicicleta y salió a estrenarla al jardín, en eso le grita a su mamá:<br>Mamá, mira sin una mano.<br>Y el niño siguió y siguió.<br>Mamá, mira sin dos manos.<br>Y al poco rato llegó con su mamá y le dijo:<br>¡Mamá, shin dientesh!</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-58922045858714266652012-09-07T12:50:00.001-03:002012-09-07T12:50:58.590-03:00Chiste estupido<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">-Señor lo está esperando el hombre invisible-</p><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; "><br>-Bueno, dígale que hoy no puedo verlo.-</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-41621922621586082972012-09-07T12:49:00.000-03:002012-09-07T12:50:56.963-03:00No es lo mismo<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; "><br></p><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; "><br></p><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; "><font class="Apple-style-span" face="Arial" size="6">No es lo mismo de mi vieja burra, que la burra de mi vieja.</font></p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-51277734703065584062012-09-07T12:48:00.001-03:002012-09-07T12:48:49.771-03:00Abogados<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Se encuentran dos abogados y uno le dice al otro: <br>¿Vamos a tomar algo?<br>Bueno, ¿De quién?</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-9546016177882057472012-09-07T12:47:00.001-03:002012-09-07T12:47:57.157-03:00Algo Nuevo<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Un día Jaimito le dice a su mamá:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¿Sabes mamá? la vecina de al lado sabe mucho, es inteligente."</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¿Cómo, ella es profesora de algún colegio o de tu colegio?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"No, lo digo porque mi papá siempre va con ella a su casa y le dice que le enseñe algo nuevo."</span>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-52588523682485510962012-09-06T09:35:00.001-03:002012-09-06T09:35:35.925-03:00Vendo<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Un día, va un borracho por las calles de la ciudad y, urgentemente, se detiene a orinar en un poste. En eso está cuando en la casa de enfrente ve un cartel que dice:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"VENDO MADRE SIN SENTIMIENTO"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">El sujeto se pasa la mano por los ojos y vuelve a leer pensando que había leído mal, y ve el mismo texto. Como puede toma de su saco papel y lápiz y escribe la dirección de la casa.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Al día siguiente se levanta; ve el papel sobre la mesa y recuerda el cartel y se dirige a la dirección que estaba anotada en el papel. Cuando llega allí, ve con detenimiento el cartel y lee:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"VENDO MADERA, ZINC Y CEMENTO"</span>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-48444372676668143652012-09-06T09:34:00.001-03:002012-09-06T09:34:57.540-03:00Fiesta de Papeles<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Un día, los diferentes tipos de papel que existen en el mundo organizan una convivencia. Todos los papeles van llegando a la fiesta en sus mejores galas.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">El anfitrión los anuncia cuando llega cada tipo de papel:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¡Demos un aplauso para nuestro amigo el papel de roca, quien participó mucho en los nacimientos estas Navidades!"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Todos los papeles aplauden.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"Ahora, saludemos a nuestro gran amigo que viene desde el Lejano Oriente, ¡el papel de China!"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Igualmente todos lo festejan.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Al cabo de un rato empiezan los guardias de la entrada principal a gritar aterrorizados:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¡Cuidado, llegaron los hermanos tijeras! ¡Corran!"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Todo mundo comienza tratar de huir pero los hermanos tijera comienzan a hacer confeti de los invitados. El papel de roca, siendo el más fuerte, trata de golpear a los hermanos tijera, pero lo hacen pedazos. Del mismo modo el papel de China, sabiendo artes marciales, trata de hace! r uso de sus patadas y golpes, pero también sale derrotado. En un rincón del salón está llorando el papel cebolla. En otro, el papel albanene no sabe a donde correr... De pronto, de la nada, sale un papel desconocido por todos, comienza a brincar sobre las mesas, saca su pistola y dispara; al ver que no ha hecho mucho daño, se quita su reloj y se lo avienta a los hermanos tijera y estos explotan al instante, hechos pedazos.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">Los papeles supervivientes al caos festejan el triunfo de este papel desconocido y le preguntan:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¿Quién eres?"</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">El papel, con un tono serio y media sonrisa, responde:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><br></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; ">"¡Bond, papel Bond!"</span>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-57036588573000467492012-09-03T21:01:00.001-03:002012-09-03T21:01:29.263-03:00Empleado leal<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Llega un patrón a la casa de otro y pregunta al portero:<br>¿Está el patrón?<br>No, se fue a un entierro.<br>¿Tardará mucho en volver?<br>No sé, iba en el ataúd.</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-82071959261179523232012-09-03T21:00:00.001-03:002012-09-03T21:00:40.136-03:00Pronombres<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">ver Jaimito 2 pronombres. </p><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; "><br>¿Quién? ¿Yo?</p><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; "><br>Muy bien, ¡Aprobado!</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-53387812539697731382012-09-03T20:59:00.003-03:002012-09-03T20:59:53.540-03:00Jaimito<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Esto es una clase en la que la profesora dice que van a estudiar las onomatopeyas. Entonces, la profesora dice: <br>Tu Juanito, dime una frase con una onomatopeya. <br>Juanito dice: <br>Llegué a casa y el gato me dijo miau, miau. <br>Muy bien, dice la profesora. <br>Ahora tu Alfonso. <br>Fui al pantano y la rana dijo croac, croac. <br>Muy bien, ahora tu Jaimito.<br>Iba por un callejón me encontré a un camión de frente y dije:<br>¡Oh, no m'atopella!</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-74039282720053323322012-09-03T20:59:00.001-03:002012-09-03T20:59:33.527-03:00Novios<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">En la mañana no desayuno porque pienso en ti, al mediodía no almuerzo porque pienso en ti, en la tarde no meriendo porque pienso en ti, y en al noche no duermo, ¡porque tengo hambre!</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-28729196814270783392012-09-03T20:58:00.001-03:002012-09-03T20:58:44.479-03:00Borrachos<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Iba caminando por la calle un borrachito y se encuentra con su compadre, y éste al ver que el borrachito tenía las orejas a carne viva le pregunta:<br>Pero, ¿qué te ha pasado compadre? <br>Es que a mi esposa se le ocurrió dejar la plancha prendida, y sonó el teléfono y agarré la plancha por equivocación.<br>Pero, ¿y la otra? Y el borrachito le contesta:<br>El maldito imbécil volvió a llamar.<br></p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-70147807561624730242012-09-03T20:57:00.002-03:002012-09-03T20:58:11.587-03:00Sepelio<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Martín estaba trabajando, cuando su jefe le pregunta:<br>¿No va a ir al velorio de su suegra?<br>Y él le dice:<br>No jefe, primero el trabajo, después la diversión.</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-61843529885960102972012-09-03T20:57:00.001-03:002012-09-03T20:57:30.455-03:00orden del jefe<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">El jefe ordena a su secretaria escribir una nota, citando a reunión con todo el personal, para el próximo viernes. La secretaria no muy experta en ortografía, pregunta a su jefe:<br>¿Cómo se escribe viernes, con v o b?<br>El jefe responde:<br>¡Cambie la reunión para el lunes! </p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1761274898037754059.post-19644352150258368672012-09-03T20:56:00.001-03:002012-09-03T20:56:31.375-03:00Indios<table class="colorTable" align="center" border="2" width="520" bordercolor="#CCCC00" bordercolorlight="#CCCC00" bordercolordark="#CCCC00" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" style="font-size: x-small; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 148); font-family: Arial, 'Times New Roman', Verdana, Helvetica; position: static; z-index: auto; "><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="left" height="186" width="374"><p class="chiste" align="left" style="color: black; font-size: x-small; ">Esta era una carrera en el viejo oeste estaban compitiendo un vaquero y un indio. Arrancan, van muy parejos en toda la carrera y ya en el final, el vaquero se echa un gas y sale como alma que se lo lleva el diablo y gana la carrera. Después llega el indio y le dice todo cansado:<br>Tú hacer trampa, tú tener motor en el trasero.</p></td></tr></tbody></table>Old Manhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08152896369313102943noreply@blogger.com0